Mutch's Diary
The Road's editor
From the swamps of West Africa to swamp muffins in Oxford, there's never a dull moment...
On the back of the first ROAD we promised to take you places and with this issue we go more than the extra mile with a monster ambitious trip half way across Africa.
As soon as the Brigadier told me about his plans to cross the Sahara I knew I was going to regret not making this one and at the last minute I actually considered going but failed to get it together in time.
By way of a second best I flew out with the Brigadier's wife and spent a week in the Gambia at the mid point of the epic where I interviewed the intrepid duo. This wasn't purely gratuitous adventure but a kind of conclusion to Simon Milward's trip that ended in the tragic crash in Mali as well as being a tactic to publicise his medical outreach work that uses motorcycles.
In this connection we went to The Riders for Health base and were afforded hospitality by the staff who showed us their operation and the road conditions that their riders have to contend with. If you think we've got potholes here in the UK go and spend a week in the Gambia, you'd think they had machinery out there digging them.
After seeing the party off on their homeward voyage I typed up the account of the trip on my laptop from notes I'd made of our discussions and trotted off to meet some crocodiles. Now I've never stroked one of these giant reptiles before so this was another experience ticked off the list of must dos and I was told that one of them, a beast called Charlie, was OK. My guide, who called himself Tony Blair, assured me the Charlie was totally cool with people but I'd been warned to back off if his mates started coming up out of the pool. Half way through the encounter as I was shaking one of Charlie's scaly hands, an ominous thought struck me - 'This is definitely Charlie isn't it? I asked. Tony put his head on one side, adopting a quizzical expression as he examined the 18 inch jaws lined with interlocking fangs.
'Errrr yes that's Charlie,' Tony assured me, grinning hugely.
I flew home next day, all in one piece thankfully, and just in time to make dinner at the Lee Bay Christmas bash in Devon. From the airport via three trains and Doug's car, I made it to the hotel in the lost valley near Exmoor just in time for dinner. Talk about a cultural contrast, it was like jumping from one movie to another.
The next day I returned home to find a letter from the Somerset police force who assure me that they are going to see me in court for the heinous offences of parking on the hard shoulder by the Severn bridge (see Hogin' the Bridge P 78) and failing to notice that someone had stolen my tax disc. With homicidal maniacs being paroled after barely crumpling their prison bedding and motorcycle thieves being let off with stern warnings it's good to see that our legal system has got its priorities bang on target. I've written about a campaign for real justice before and it isn't something I'm inclined to drop as I am certain the vast majority of people must feel the same way. I suspect that despair with the authorities has sapped people's sense of 'can do' and that is something that we have to change.
In this vein I had a call from Pat, the Editor of 100% Biker the other day. She was thinking of publishing the names of convicted motorcycle thieves, a 'scroat of the month' column. 'Go for it' say I, and I'm happy to publish them in the ROAD as well, so long as they have definitely been convicted and we get the information direct from the courts.
Talking of the law, I understand the police are looking for the man who made talkative teenagers refund his cinema ticket for spoiling his enjoyment of the film The Chronicles of Narnia. I am also looking for him as I want to shake his hand. If more members of the public took a stand against louts it would be a damn good thing. If the police were more concerned with justice than the letter of the law they would have one word for the arrogant selfish youths in the cinema - 'tough'.
A member writing in the letters page of this issue takes me to task for being too right wing in the expression of these sentiments but I don't see it as right wing. Getting tough with criminals has historically been viewed in this country as something associated with the right but many communist regimes were far tougher with criminals than we ever where. Treating criminals like criminals isn't right wing, it's just right.
MAG is politically neutral in the party sense and I'm a classic floating voter. My feeling is that party politics is almost dead. Today's politics is all about centre ground occupation. This provides a climate in which politics is led much more by issues or faith in individuals than by ideologies and that is good news for groups like ours as we can draw support from across the political spectrum with no need to nail our colours to any ship's mast.
Up to Yorkshire for a reps training seminar at which I make a presentation on submitting material for The ROAD. Fortunately the rapid mass adoption of technology has meant that most contributions do now arrive electronically which is a huge help.
West to Oxford for a meeting of the motorcycle media organised by the Motorcycle Industry and hosted by Harley-Davidson. After putting the world to rights we retire to a hotel for an evening meal. Now comments at the meeting are supposed to be confidential but I can tell you this. MCN's lanky Editor Mark Potter has a voracious appetite for Swamp muffins. I baked a dozen of them for a cute girl at the MCIA known as Agent S. her name being Samanstrovich. Well I'd put them on a table in the hotel bar and blow me down Potter stuffed the lot down his gaping maw.
The EMAP publications have marginalised the riders' lobby for years and it's time they changed their tune. Please bombard them with letters telling them that you know the truth about muffinman Potter and if MAG doesn't get a six page spread on its activities then you will spill the beans. mcn.letters@ecm.emap.com
Ian 'swampmuffin baker' Mutch
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